Saturday, February 20, 2010

Yvette's New Artist in Residence

CAUTION! This post is completely inane. ~*~*~*~*~*~*~!!!
As I believe I have already mentioned, I am continually blown away by this website. Especially the new page on their artist in residence. I keep asking myself if this is some amazingly peculiar joke, or a bid for the worst website of all time, but I think it's really serious... I imagine Yvette's to be some kind of magnetic spot where really, really strange people congregate and devise even more nauseating website backgrounds while helping unsuspecting bride-to-be's into apricot-coloured gowns and plotting the return of classical art using household pigments like ketchup red and banana yellow.

And I quote from the artist's bio:
"I have often been asked whether I attended school for my art
education......perhaps the College of Visual Arts, Theater and
Dance @ Florida State University in Tallahassee, the capital of
Florida, or maybe the Maryland Institute College of Art in the
vicinity of the capital of the United States ~*
.........the honest truth is that I have not had the benefit of any
formal education in the Visual Arts at a contemporary art
institute, college or school ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
if the answer was yes, I know I would have gained a great deal
of advantage from such experience ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
my entrance into the wonderful world of Fine Arts, particularly
Drawing & Painting Portraits, came about in a rather unusual
manner, it seems ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
about six years ago I experienced an amazing Triad of
repeating dream patterns !! ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
for three consecutive nights I was enraptured in the spell of
the most illuminating pageantry of beautiful dreams ~*~*~*~*
regal delightful dreams of rainbows and butterflies and
fireflies and lightening flashes and yellow canaries and
swallow song and sea waves and puffy pink flamingos and
soft white clouds passing aimlessly across a cerulean sky and
stars and spinning spiral galaxies and sunsets and sunrises
on worlds that seemed a world away and to and fro on this
nightly magic carpet ride ~*~* these brilliant, mystical dreams
always ended in the same way........the sound of a heart
pulsing in the midst of random patterns of colors swirling all
around me ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
on the morning after the third night of these enigmatic esoteric
journeys, I was sitting comfortably out back in my tile floored
Florida Room with the ceiling fan on a low setting when a
feeling of inspiration began to overwhelm me........something
like an instantaneous desperation hit me out of the proverbial
blue and I experienced a great compassion to do
something.........."do what?", I thought to myself.........this
uncertainty and confusion lasted for what now seems like 5 or
10 minutes.........I wanted to do something...........I strongly
desired to engage in some sort of activity but I had no idea
what said activity could possibly be ?? ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
then, in a flash, it was clear to me..........I saw myself sitting
before an easel ( at that time I didn't even know what an easel
was nor did I know anything about paint or painting ) with a
palette in one hand and artist's brushes in the other slinging
every color imaginable upon a huge canvas !! ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

..........all the tropical fishes in all the tropical seas of the world and
the majestic polar ices with their arctic casts of shining
auroras abound from here to all eternia and beyond in the
lively parade of promenade adorned in natural royal regalia
gifting us with essential elements of earthen delight !! ~*~*~*~*
~*~*~*~*~*~* sharing happiness with others is a temporal and
~*~*~*~* ethereal pleasure, the wellspring of prosperity ~*
/~~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* Unquote...